May 19, 2009

To Momma,

To me, it's a miracle that I've served a mission. But I think it's perhaps an even greater miracle that you've managed to survive me being on another continent for two years. Congratulation, Momma! I'm sending everyone smaller personal e-mails today to say thanks for things and whatnot. Really, I don't know where to begin. There's so much. I want to thank you for being my Mom, for having raised me, for having supported me, for having given me so much and for having been an example to me and a standard for what I should look for when I want to get married. There's so much to be thankful for on the side of a son who has good parents--especially a good Mother. I love you, Momma. I wish I could actually express in words how much, but so long as that's impossible, just know that I love you.

I like to think that for every son there's a lot to be sorry for. Part of me learning and changing on the mission is recognizing just what an idiot I really was before. Not that I'm perfect now. I have many flaws. But I've learned a lot. Really, if anyone were to ask me what was the price I had to pay for me to learn to do what is right, I would say "two years of my life as a missionary". That having been said, I'm sorry for anything I've done in the past that has made you even a little worried, sad, upset, disappointed, frustrated or any other mildly negative adjective you can imagine. Now, don't go thinking too much about those things, just know that I'm sorry for all the stupid things I've done to make your job harder in the past. I can't do much to make it up to you while I'm here but you can be sure that once I'm home I'm at your disposal to do WHATEVER YOU WANT! You name it. I love you more than I can say and I've gained an incredible appreciation for motherhood, especially for my own mother. As far as things I can do here, if you remember last Sunday on Mother's Day I did dedicate the song "Hey Momma" by Kanye West to you! I don't know if anyone managed to play it during the day but feel free to take a listen, haha. Really though, it's a good song. I like it at least.

Momma, we've got a lot to do when I get home! I'm excited. I'm SO excited!

Don't worry, I'm not going to be condemning anyone to hell when I get home. You can be sure of that. I'm not here to judge anyone. I've made a goal to not be what they call, in Portuguese, "chato", which connotes anything at all displeasing or irritating. I know a lot of returned missionaries get that way. I would rather not be chato. Nevertheless, if anyone is seeking my counsel for any reason I would gladly share my opinion. But most likely only If I'm asked.

I love you. I can't wait to see you again. As a matter of fact, I HAVE missed you all this time, and I will be so happy to be all yours again. I love you.

Jordan

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